“Mom, You Should Move Closer to Us.”

“Mom, you should move closer. We’d see each other more.”

It’s a lovely thought. Sunday dinners. Being there for a grandchild’s birthday without booking a flight. Having someone nearby when you need a hand.

But if you’ve built a life where you are, there may be a lot to leave behind: friends, familiar neighbors, your favorite walking route, and people who know you beyond being someone’s mom.

You can want more time with your family and still hesitate.

In AARP’s 2024 national survey, 75% of adults age 50 and older wanted to remain in their current home for as long as possible, and 73% wanted to remain in their community. Those numbers offer some perspective on why this decision deserves a thoughtful conversation.

Before looking at listings, here are five things I’d encourage your family to talk through.

1. What does “closer” mean to each of you?

You might picture dinner together twice a week. Your daughter might picture a monthly visit, with the reassurance that you’re nearby.

Neither expectation is unreasonable. But you’ll want to understand the difference before making a move.

Ask: “If I lived nearby, what would a normal week together actually look like?”

Talk about work schedules, weekends, babysitting, privacy, and how much time everyone realistically has.

2. How settled are your children?

Could a job change take them somewhere else? Are they considering a move when the children finish school? Where do they hope to retire?

They may not have definite answers. Still, it’s worth asking yourself: Would I enjoy living in this area if they moved away?

Look for reasons you would choose the community for yourself, too.

3. What would your own life look like there?

Spend time in the area during an ordinary week. Buy groceries. Drive the route between your potential home and your family’s home when you’d actually be making the trip.

Explore somewhere you could meet people or continue an activity you enjoy. Think about how you’d spend a Tuesday afternoon when everyone else is busy.

If practical, consider an extended visit or a short rental before committing to a purchase. Treat it as a chance to experience everyday life there.

4. What help is everyone comfortable giving?

This conversation goes both ways.

Are you hoping for occasional help with appointments? Are your children hoping you’ll provide regular childcare? If someone becomes ill, who else could help?

Be specific about what each person can offer. Include transportation, outside services, and a backup plan rather than assuming one family member will handle everything.

It’s easier to discuss expectations before anyone feels stretched or disappointed.

5. What do the actual housing numbers look like?

Start with an estimate of what you could keep from selling your current home after paying off any mortgage and covering selling expenses.

Then compare that with the cost of the next home, moving expenses, and ongoing bills such as property taxes, insurance, maintenance, and association dues.

Use figures for the properties and locations you’re considering. A lower purchase price alone won’t tell you what your monthly expenses will be.

Start the conversation before you need a moving date

Moving closer to family can give you something wonderful: more opportunities to be part of each other’s everyday lives.

The planning deserves just as much attention as the possibility.

As a Seniors Real Estate Specialist® with First Team Real Estate, I understand why leaving a longtime home deserves care. My role is to help you understand your housing options, work through the sale details, and give you room to make an informed decision.

Wondering what your home could sell for?

Understanding your home’s value is a helpful first step when considering a move.

If moving closer to family is on your mind, contact me, too. I’m happy to help you explore your options, even if you haven’t decided when—or whether—to move.

Lori Anderson, SRES®
First Team Real Estate | DRE #02080178